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illegalaustralien:

Friend: If you had a superpower, which one would you choose?

Me:

image

theblackgreywarden:

rude—drum:

lifeisdisney:

we need to talk about shrek more

Literally all the internet talks about is Shrek

cumleak:

libbykeppen:

collegecutiepie:

gaysealapproves:

ellieintheskywithdiamonds:

altair-ibn-la-booty:

tristan-thorn-is-my-hero:

mojosodope178:

theweedteacher:

Wait so in order to shoot this commercial they actually gave two little kids dildos and said go fight with these

double wait…they used kids playing with dildos to promote gun safety?

This is fucking amazing to me…

See, she didn’t lock up her dildos so they naturally thought they were swords, thus then playing with them.
Now, if she had forgotten to lock up her guns and the kids started playing with them…
See where I’m getting at?

 (via archmasterjazzy)

my daughter found my “toy box” once… so yes… this scenerio does happen, they play with everything and anything.

Lock up your guns, but also PLEASE TEACH YOUR CHILDREN WHY YOU DON’T PLAY WITH THEM.

SERIOUSLY.

Education is best. Yes, lock them up. But also teach them boundaries and they won’t be looking through shit in the first plae.

Dont have kids!

cuntology:

brentwalker092:

scrumrob:

He definitely got a patch for sodomy.


As a former boy scout this hella turns me on

ur shirt doesn’t fit

cuntology:

brentwalker092:

scrumrob:

He definitely got a patch for sodomy.

As a former boy scout this hella turns me on

ur shirt doesn’t fit

werewolf1992:

the-tavros-nitram:

lzbth:

LOOK HOW MANY FLYERS HAVE BEEN STUck on tHIS LAMPOST?? germans are crazy

there is no lamp post its pure flyer

You could carbon date this to the ice age

werewolf1992:

the-tavros-nitram:

lzbth:

LOOK HOW MANY FLYERS HAVE BEEN STUck on tHIS LAMPOST?? germans are crazy

there is no lamp post its pure flyer

You could carbon date this to the ice age

captainspensaurus:

immortal-lord-godsmoke:

answeringmysister:

blkmartian:

saintwerewolf:

bankuei:


losthopesandfadeddreams:

be-blackstar:

"their chicken is really spicy" "beware, the injera is spicy""the water is spicy" 

"the air was spicy"


"The staff was very rude"
"The dim sum restaurant didn’t have a menu"
"They gave me chopsticks"

"They asked me to wash my hands before I sat down to eat, something about traditions? I was humiliated"
"The staff didn’t speak English"

"The chair was spicy""The ice was spicy"

"Service was great. Food was great. Couldn’t find parking" - 1 star

'my napkins were only one ply. no free breadsticks”- 1/2 star

"the staff was spicy"

captainspensaurus:

immortal-lord-godsmoke:

answeringmysister:

blkmartian:

saintwerewolf:

bankuei:

losthopesandfadeddreams:

be-blackstar:

"their chicken is really spicy" 
"beware, the injera is spicy"
"the water is spicy" 

"the air was spicy"

"The staff was very rude"

"The dim sum restaurant didn’t have a menu"

"They gave me chopsticks"

"They asked me to wash my hands before I sat down to eat, something about traditions? I was humiliated"

"The staff didn’t speak English"

"The chair was spicy"
"The ice was spicy"

"Service was great. Food was great. Couldn’t find parking" - 1 star

'my napkins were only one ply. no free breadsticks”- 1/2 star

"the staff was spicy"

lemonschedule:

odins-nose:

Oh

Literally oh

mercuryjones:

Classic from American Horror Story

barackobotm:

the american school system 

image

invaderotaku:

kalliat:

how do boys actually dry their ducks after they shower like

do you just grab it in the towel and roll it between your hands like a dough snake

or do you swing it around to air dry

I need to know

image

heisenbergchronicles:

5x14: Ozymandias
Observations: “Vince Gilligan has famously said that Breaking Bad is the story of how Mr. Chips becomes Scarface. And it’s true, and that’s the exciting, attention-getting way of putting it. But it is equally, and heartbreakingly, the story of the journey from ‘Will do. Love you’ to ‘You stupid bitch! How dare you.’”– from James Poniewozik’s review of Ozymandias

heisenbergchronicles:

5x14: Ozymandias

Observations: “Vince Gilligan has famously said that Breaking Bad is the story of how Mr. Chips becomes Scarface. And it’s true, and that’s the exciting, attention-getting way of putting it. But it is equally, and heartbreakingly, the story of the journey from ‘Will do. Love you’ to ‘You stupid bitch! How dare you.’”
– from James Poniewozik’s review of Ozymandias